I recently listened to a podcast from a not-so-typical mom. I believe she is more common than you might think, however most women aren’t so outspoken about it. After hearing her I felt empowered!
I am a mom of four, (9,9,3, 18 mths), I have been married to my husband for almost 13 years, and I have always worked either in or outside of my home since becoming a mom. I always new I wanted children, in fact we had to try very hard and pay a lot of money to have them! With that being said, I also knew I wanted to have a career too.
I will never forget the day before my c-section with my oldest two, it was also my last day of working in the medical office I had been with for years. I CRIED! Not because I was scared or excited or nervous…..because I was sad. Sad that from the next morning forward I would be a different person, have different priorities and have to change the way I lived my life.
Now before you get all crazy, remember, I wanted to be a mom. I was happy, I was just also mourning the independence and the freedom that not having kids allowed.
Since having the twins, and then adding to the mix with two more, I have worked full time, part time, from home and now all of the above!
I get all the time, “wow, you are so busy.” which I know sometimes means, “do you ever see your kids?” or “don’t you think your kids need you home?” Let me break it down for ya!
First and foremost, I have a great partner! My husband is the strength to my weaknesses, he is there when I am not and he is my biggest supporter. Second to him, I have an amazing friend/babysitter for my younger kids that loves them even better than I can some days! We don’t live by any family since relocating to northern Kentucky last year, so its just us! I must say I think we do pretty great!
It is not like I have some amazing career that brings in a ton of money, I am an ER nurse. I work for the love of it, the reward of making a difference. With that being said, I work the night shift so that I am home to make breakfast for the kids and get them on the bus, I can go to school functions and volunteer when needed and still be home for dinner as a family every night. Some things are not negotiable, family dinners is one of them.
Within the past year, I have also added personal training to my resume. I have always had a passion for fitness, never dreaming it would result in income for my family and making a difference in other peoples lives. Yes it is time away from home, but again, my kids are home with their dad… their other parent…the other half of their DNA…. the other person God gave them as a protector and a provider.
Knowing myself, I know that if I was a stay at home mom full time I would not feel complete. That is just how I was designed. A lot of women, some of my friends even, do it and love it and are great at it! I only use a babysitter about 16 hours a week. I am a better mom when I have balance between home, work, fitness and dates with my husband.
Some thoughts for you…. If you can embrace your “opportunities” as an area to let others show their “strengths” isn’t it a win-win for everyone? If a relationship with their father is great for a daughter and a son, shouldn’t mom allow that to happen, sometimes without interruption? If God meant for us to do it all he would not have given us a spouse/partner to share the load with!
I hope that you can see my heart here and maybe see yourself with a little less magnification. You don’t have to be great at everything(you should see my house 😦 ), and you don’t have to be what everyone thinks you should be. If the roles of the people in your family work, then work it! If not, make some changes. God bless!